Know Yourself: Four Ways to Have More Fun

How do you recharge your batteries after a tough day?  Understanding your basic needs of how you recover from a tough day helps you handle the next tough day.

An easy place to start is to figure out if you are an introvert or extrovert.  Simply put, an introvert is a person who recharges his batteries by being alone.  An extrovert is a person who recharges by being with a group.  After a long tough day, what sounds better to you – going home and curling up with a good book or going out with a group of friends?

When you know your preferences and basic needs, it is easier to recognize situations that are challenges to your personality.

For example, I don’t like to go shopping with a group of friends.  Going to a mall with three or more women is not my idea of a good time.  I prefer to go on my own at my own pace.  If there are several shoppers involved, I’ll stop at stores I’m not interested and will probably wait on other shoppers.  I may get rushed at the stores when others have finished shopping.   When I am invited to go shopping with a group or something else that doesn’t jive with my personality, I use these tactics to have fun.

Redefine

Redefine the experience to something that you like to do instead of something that you dread.  I prefer to “be sociable” rather than dreaded “shopping in a group”.  I’ll have more fun if I know that I’m there to hold someone’s purse or to help find something in a different size than if I were there to shop for myself.

Limit Exposure

Another tactic is to limit your exposure by enforcing your own time constraint. Maybe I want to go to be socialable, but I don’t want to commit my entire Saturday to the mall.  I’ll set a time constraint by staying until lunch.  I know that “shopping in a group” tries my patience so I will set a boundary or an exit strategy to a point that I know I can handle.

Compromise

You can compromise and come up with an alternate solution that works better for everyone.   I know that I’m not going for shopping,  but I do want to hang out with my friends, so I will suggest meeting them someplace for lunch.

Say No

Allow yourself to say no.  I allow myself to say “no” to shopping in a group.  It’s not my thing, and I know it.  If I don’t want redefine, set a time constraint, or compromise, I know that going along on the shopping trip won’t be fun for me.   I will decline without regret.

If you want a better understanding of your personality, I suggest a Myers Briggs*  personality test.  There are many versions of the test on-line that can provide you insights to your personality.   Look for the versions that are free with fewer questions.  If you want to learn more, you can find the longer version of the survey.  The great thing about the questionnaire is that the questions provide subject areas you may not have thought about.  Understanding your preferences, helps identify the situations which are best for you.  Knowing your personality, your likes, and dislikes will to guide you to things that you enjoy doing.  Redefine, set time constraints, or compromise on those things which are a challenge to your personality.

Journal Entry:

Write about a time that you had fun.  What were the things that made it fun? Why is it a time that your remember?

Challenge:

Think of the last time that you didn’t have fun.  How could you have redefined, set a time constraint, or compromised the situation so that you could have had fun?

* See www.wikipedia.com for more details about Myers Briggs personality test